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We are not objects to have secret sex with, to discard and to laugh at on the radio or the gossip blogosphere.

We are worthy of being seen and are not dirty or shameful.

A man’s desire for my body, my brain, my brilliance and my existence is not a laughing matter because I am not a joke.

RELATED VIDEO: I appear with Laverne Cox on Huffpost Live to discuss loving trans women When I met my boyfriend Aaron and disclosed that I am trans, he did not question his sexuality.

If a man dares to be seen with a trans woman, he will likely lose social capital so he must adamantly deny, vehemently demean, trash and/or exterminate the woman in question.

He must do this to maintain his standing in our patriarchal society.

In effect, we’re telling trans women that they are only deserving of secret interactions with men, further demeaning and stigmatizing trans women.

I’ve stood witness to many so-called scandals, mostly published on gossip blogs, where passing interactions with trans women spawn hundreds of headlines, particularly for a man with fame and social capital.

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This questioning has led many well-known men to adamantly defend their heterosexuality and has tarnished the reputation and careers of others.Until we begin checking how we delegitimize the identities, bodies and existence of trans women and stigmatize the men who yearn to with us, we will continue to marginalize our sisters, pushing them further into socially-sanctioned invisibility, left in the dark to fend for themselves with men who don’t have the space to explore, define and embrace their attraction to various women. Be respectful of people’s identities, bodies and pronouns.Misgendering, slurs, threats, anti-trans rhetoric and/or outright ignorance will not be tolerated.This list includes both transgender men who were assigned female at birth, and transgender women who were assigned male at birth, as well as a few intersex or nonbinary celebrities.All of these folks are talented and accomplished, and many of them are pretty sexy, too!

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